I’ve had many wonderful birthdays, but turning 40 has been the best so far. I feel so right in my skin, as if all I have been through over the years has been processed into life lessons that have finally sunk in at the perfect moment. I can see where I’ve been, where I’m going, and find happiness with where I am until then. So believe me, 40 is nothing to be afraid of.
I’m having a MID-LIFE CELEBRATION. I have totally arrived. I feel empowered by 40. I mean, what do those 30 year olds really know? Not much, I can tell you having been one for the past 10 years. But, that was yesterday. Literally, YESTERDAY.
But, here I sit. LUCKY. GRATEFUL. With a PERSPECTIVE that most people don’t have. Giving as best I can to my people. Giving, in some small way I hope, to you.
And, I have to tell you, I think my 40 year old self is awesome — not perfect in anyway, but evolved for certain. Perfectly, imperfect.
Here are the lessons learned;
- My 40-year-old self has learned to say NO instead of nodding YES with resentment, and continues to cultivate this practice because it is HARD. She QUITS when necessary and knows that QUITTING does not mean failure (because nothing really means failure), rather it is GROWTH. Having spent most of her life as the PEACEMAKER and PEOPLE PLEASER, she no longer cares too much of what people think, only that she does right by those who fill her home and sit at her kitchen table, regardless of when they show up. She is FEARLESS because she has walked right up to fear, embraced it and moved right on.
- I feel that I am now finally on my life’s path of living my purpose, I am truly happy. I decided to choose HAPPINESS and be GRATEFUL for what I do have, More importantly, I am clearly blessed to be surrounded by an inspiring and supportive family and friends. By being present in the current moment it is easier to be grateful for the blessings that surround us. I truly feel by being mindful that life isn’t about anti-aging measures, but more importantly it is about aging with health, gratitude, and happiness.
- I tame the inner critic in my head. You know that voice. The one saying you aren’t smart enough, pretty enough, strong enough, wealthy enough. By 40, you know it well enough to tell it to shut up. You can tell it, “Slow down… I know that challenges are what change me and make me better. I know you are trying to help by telling me I am not ready… but I am ready. And I know if you are speaking up it is something that will make be a better person on the other side. Thanks for reminding me and egging me on.”
- I ask. You know your worth and you aren’t afraid to ask for it. You realize that “you miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t take,” and there really is nothing to lose.
- I got rid of the toxic people in my life; the friends you keep in your life have your back… you weed out the others. It saves a lot of emotional angst.
- I am more beautiful; Any 40-something women who decides to eat well and find one exercise they like to do looks better than they did at 20. Yes, you may lose the baby fat or spring, but there is beauty in living a full life. You see yourself more kindly. You feel at home in your body, and it shows.
So, here I am, about to embark on the journey of my fourth decade.
40, I’m ready for you; let’s do this.